Hello Exceeders 💜
I have been sort of missing but it was definitely time needed. God has been revealing and healing some things in me and I have just been along for the ride. One constant theme that kept coming in all of this time was “wait”. It came in many different ways. It came in sermons, conversations, TV shows, you name it, the subject of WAIT was there. It made me realize that I was in that season, the season of wait on the Lord.
I began to think about the state of mind that I was in when I realized how long it had been since I wrote down my thoughts. I was in a place of slight frustration. I wouldn’t let it become my everyday mood but it was definitely something to take notice of. I had to be honest with myself that I was not patiently waiting on the Lord. I was irritable, agitated, annoyed. I was all these things that could very well be for any reason but I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. I’m going through the same season this year that I went through last year but I’m DETERMINED to have a different outcome. I’m determined to trust God no matter what. That is my set goal for 2020. Trust God. That is my answer to everybody about everything! Need help with a problem? TRUST GOD! Things not going right? TRUST GOD. Trust God was all I could give anybody, including myself.
I began to transform but there was one thing that I still wasn’t handling well…..the wait. I know, it sounds weird, “Ricka, how could you not be handling the wait well when all your answers were trust God?” I’m going to tell you how…..in small every day actions.
I had to ask myself,
“What are you doing in your wait?”
“Are you trying to “help” God?”
“Are you still trying to figure it out?”
“Are you still making plans and plots?”
I had to come to terms with the fact that the things I thought were harmless were telling God exactly what I think He can do. I began to notice that I was forcing myself to be patient. I was forcing myself to think positive. I was forcing myself to see that God had a plan way bigger than who I am now. Yes, sometimes we have to take back control of our minds but I had to realize that if I have to force myself every single day to trust God…do I really trust God? All we need is faith the size of a mustard seed but how long does it stay the size of a mustard seed? I put restraints on God just by letting my impatience take over.
In this season of wait, I had to be okay with God saying no, not yet. Not only did I have to be okay with it, I had to put myself in a position to hear Him say it. I had to form the habit of asking God for permission. I lost so many physical things this year, things I know were taken to break the spirit of pride, but God is still providing for me. I’m coming out of this season of lack and there are things I feel like I could replace but I hear God saying not yet. Don’t let the loses, the storms, the people around you, the things you think you want, the things you didn’t want to lose keep you from the promises of God. Anything you get out of the will of God you have to stay out of the will of God to keep.
“He giveth power to the faint; and to them that have no might he increaseth strength. Even the youths shall faint and be weary, and the young men shall utterly fall: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.”
Isaiah 40:29-31 KJV